The Large Family Dilemma

TOEFL Independent Writing Example 3 – Explain Both Sides Prompt

Some people believe that growing up in a large family, with several sisters and brothers, offers more advantages than disadvantages. Other people think that being the only child is more advantageous.

Write a short essay in which you discuss the advantages and disadvantages of each position. Explain which position you support.   

Having children is a blessing and a wonderful experience. The important question is, how many children should we have? I have a big family. I love my family and sisters. However, we did not have an easy life while we were growing up, because there were too many of us. Because of my large family, I’ve always wondered what it would like to have a smaller family. Let’s look at the pros and cons of both.
Growing up in a large family has many benefits if the family is wealthy enough. Children can have a great opportunity to enjoy their childhood with their sisters and brothers without thinking about financial issues. Also, they can have better communication skills and learn to share and respect each other at an early age. The only disadvantage I can think of is having several children adds more financial burdens. If the family isn’t wealthy enough to support several children, this may create unhappiness and jealousy among the children. They could feel that the reason they do not have a comfortable life is their sisters or brothers.
Being an only child is a dream of most children who have sisters or brothers because the only child gets all the family’s attention. An only child will have her own room, can attend more activities and has most of the things she needs and wants. Even though she may feel lonely from time to time, they can have play dates with the other children. Another disadvantage of being the only child is that she may be bombarded with her parents’ expectations.
I have 3 sisters, and I always dreamed of being the only child. When we were young, we had limited resources, and we had to share everything. If I needed new shoes, my sisters needed them at the same time too. I never liked to see the desperate look on my dad’s face each time we needed something new. It was hard on them as much as it was hard on us. For example, we always wanted to join the school trips, but according to my dad, it was a luxury expense. It was not just the school trips that we missed; we missed a beautiful childhood while we were facing the financial issues that our parents had the children around us were from families with only one or two children. So, sometimes I would feel shy to tell that we were four girls. They always dressed better and had fancy birthday parties, but we never did. I always thought if I was the only child, I could have a better life like others. Even though we always had enough and what is necessary, as a child, I wanted to have more than just the basics. We all graduated from good colleges, and we all have decent lives now. However, I still feel sad when I think back and remember our tough times. I would never want my children to worry about what I can afford or what I can’t afford. For these reasons, I believe that being an only child has more advantageous.
In conclusion, I am of the opinion that being the only child is the best. I love the quote, “The grass is always greener on the other side.”, and I know I may be biased about my opinion. On the other hand, our childhood and the time we spend with our parents at an early age are very valuable and irreplaceable. So, if having several children means working weekends and worrying about finances, I definitely believe that having one child is the smartest thing to do.